As
you intend to live when you are gone out, so it is in your
power to live here. But if men do not permit you, then get away out of life,
yet do so as if you were suffering no harm.
The
house is smoky, and I quit it. Why do you think that this is any trouble?
But
so long as nothing of the kind drives me out, I remain, I am free, and no man
shall hinder me from doing what I choose; and I choose to do
what is according to the nature of the rational and social animal.
—Marcus
Aurelius, Meditations, Book 5 (tr
Long)
Some people speak only about how
much better life will be when it’s over. Others cling to life frantically, as
if survival were the only measure of living. Some can’t wait to die, because
the here and now isn’t good enough for them, while others can’t bear the
thought of dying, because there is nothing except the here and now for them.
The Stoic may look on with some confusion, not sure what all the fuss is about.
There is no need to either run from
life or cling to life. I shouldn’t have to look forward to a better time, since
I can make this a better time. I shouldn’t be afraid to lose this time, since
how well I can live is never determined by how long I can live.
The Stoic will not pray for death,
and he will not fear death. Death is indifferent, a completely natural
occurrence, that is not in itself good or bad; it is only good or bad in what
we make of it. The Stoic can think this way not because he is careless or
heartless, but because he understands that quality takes precedence over
quantity.
I am given some time, however long
or short, and the value of my life will come from my actions, how fully I live
according to wisdom and virtue. More or less time will not change how well or
how poorly I choose to do this. I can be content with this, at any given moment,
and I need not ask for anything else.
Why put it off until tomorrow? I can
do it now, which is all I am sure to have. Am I given another day? Good, then I
will do my best on that day as well. Is it time for it to end? That will also
be fine, as I can be content that my part was well played.
Someone or something can take my
life, can force me out, and then it is time to go. I will only hesitate if I
have cared for all the wrong things. While I am still here, it is completely
within my power to act from good character, and anything that is done to me can
only be a further opportunity to practice it.
I think of all the people I have
known who have died, and those who accepted their deaths without complaint or
regret were almost always the same ones who had lived their lives committed
only to living well. Because they judged themselves by how they loved others
while they lived, they had no reason for feeling loss as they died.
When the house gets too smoky, it’s
time to leave.
Written in 8/2006
No comments:
Post a Comment