Galatea

Gustave Moreau, Galatea (c. 1880) 

Gustave Moreau, Galatea (1896) 

Stoic Conversations 35

"So you write all this Stoic stuff down every day? Like some Anne of Green Gables with her journal? How much time does that take?"

"Usually half an hour, maybe an hour."

"And you're like those folks complaining that they're not rich. Priceless!"

"I've never complained to you that I'm not rich."

"Find something better to do with that time, like going to the gym. You look skinny and weak. Put some real muscle on you, and then people will respect you."

"What sort of people?"

"Huh?"

"What sort of people will respect me if I get all buff?"

"The ones who matter, the ones who get the pussy, the ones who get the pay."

"I'll pass, thank you. I keep my body as fit as I can, to keep my soul as fit as I can."

"Huh?"

"Exactly."

Stoic Conversations 34

"You need to learn to walk away from the people who hurt you, learn not to care about them anymore. Then you will heal yourself."

"Walk away from them? Not care from them? Isn't that doing exactly what they did to me? There's a big difference between not letting someone else rule me and treating them poorly. Why does my healing require neglecting them?"

"Yes, but this is about you, not them. You are your first priority."

"And here I thought it was about learning to love without conditions, about all of us."

—bsc

Stoic Conversations 33

"Let me tell you, if you don't have at least four or five times more Twitter or Facebook followers than the guys you follow, you are a total loser!"

"How so?"

"It proves you're somebody, right? They all want you, but you can just stand back and be all selective."

"I see. So you're saying it's better to be loved than to love?"

"Dude, I have idea what you're saying."

"No, of course you don't. Good luck with the followers."

—bsc

Stoic Conversations 32

"I want you to fight me!"

"Why should we fight?"

"What you say is a threat to democracy!"

"I have never heard democracy complain."

"That's a part of your lies and your fascism. What you think is wrong!"

"Then I am wrong. Pity me. Explain it to me. Yelling won't do. No need to hate me."

—bsc

Stoic Conversations 31

"You know your Dad really is sort of a loser, right? He seems smart, but he can't make ends meet. I could give him some tips."

"He does his best."

"Yeah, not nearly good enough. I own two liquor stores, I live in Edmond, and I drive a fucking Cadillac Escalade. What does your Dad actually have?"

"A conscience."

—bsc

Stoic Conversations 30

"It's not like I'm doing it for money or anything!"

"No, Pigeon, you're not. Is it better that you're doing it for free?"

Stoic Conversations 29

"Maybe we just need to move things forward, and apply Stoicism to the stuff that matter now, like running a profitable business, or finding the sort of lifestyles we find comfortable."

"Profit and comfort?"

"Yeah, the stuff that matters now."

 "How are profit and comfort Stoic virtues?"

 "That's what everyone cares about these days, right?"

"Do they all care about that, or just the yuppies and the hipsters?"

"Isn't that what you care about?"

"No."

"Dude, everyone just wants to get rich and get laid."

"No, not everyone."

Stoic Conversations 28

"I'm really sorry, but you weren't supposed to know about it. I did my best to keep it from you, and I didn't actually want to hurt you. It just sort of happened."

"Isn't trust about showing, not hiding?"

"Well, yes."

"And isn't love about choosing to make something happen, not just going with what happens?"

"I guess so."

"Do you just guess, or do you know?"

Stoic Conversations 27

"You're being too stubborn, you need to compromise! It'll get you unemployed, sick, homeless, maybe in prison, maybe even dead."

"Yes, it may well still."

"That doesn't scare you?"

"It scares the crap out of me. I wouldn't choose that at all."

"Then let some things go. Pick the battles that will work out for you the best. Compromise to make your life easier."

"Yes, you're right about letting some things go. I need to let go of the things that I prefer. But I can't let go of the things that are right."

"Why make a difference? Do what works for you!"

"Yes. What works. What is easier. What is the best. Are those all the same?"

"Yes, of course."

"And that is where we must respectfully part ways. What would you compromise, and for the sake of what?"

"I don't even know what you mean."

"I'm sorry that you don't. I'll gladly compromise what I'd like done, but I won't compromise what needs to be done."

Stoic Conversations 26

"Is there a way I can use the Stoic idea of the things in my power, but in a more selfish way? I just don't like this constant stress on caring for other people. Can't I just toss that part out, and still be Stoic?"

"Short answer? No."

"What's the longer answer?"

"Absolutely not."

Stoic Conversations 25

"If you're my friend, I will love you absolutely and unconditionally, but if you cross me, I will leave you right then and there."

"Come again?"

Stoic Conversations 24

"So it's official. I'm not going to practice Buddhism anymore. I'm now practicing Stoicism."

"Was there any paperwork?"

"No, but I'm going to change the stuff on my desk to keep me inspired."

"I didn't even know you'd been a Buddhist."

"Oh yeah, almost a whole year now."

"Why can't you learn something from both of them? They don't have to exclude one another."

"No, Buddhism was just getting me down. I need to stay focused."

"Yes, it must have been the Buddhism that was getting you down. Good luck with the Stoicism."

Stoic Conversations 23

"So she tells me she won't talk to me until I stop drinking, and I tell her I won't stop drinking until she talks to me. I swear, I'm going to sit her out on this one!"

"No, you won't. A drunk man always passes out before an angry woman gives up. The next morning you'll regret it, and she'll still be angry."

"Maybe you can have a word with her? She just needs to know that I'll stop if she stops first."

"Or maybe you could just do the right thing, just because it's right, and make your decision your own. Don't take a drink, just for today, whether she talks to you or not."

"I get it, I show her by being the better man!"

"No, if you do anything just to show her, there is no way you will ever be a better man."

Stoic Conversations 22

"I'm really interested in Stoicism. I think it may fit in my life."

"I'm glad to hear it. I have extra copies of the Meditations and the Handbook sitting around, so let me know if you'd like them."

"Yeah, maybe, but I'm turned off by some parts of it. I'm not sure I can buy into all of it."

"It isn't a product, or a church, or a club. There are guys on the internet who will sell you courses, or discussion groups, or trinkets, but they are making themselves important. It's about you honestly facing yourself. There is no buying or selling."

"Sure, but I don't believe in God. I'm a materialist, so I don't think there is any deeper meaning to the world. And I don't believe in virtue, because morals are just things other people impose on us. And I don't believe we can really know anything about what life means. There is no such thing as a truth for all of us."

"Which part of Stoicism appeals to you then? What else is left?"

"The part where I have power over myself."

"Then Stoicism may not be for you right now. Read some Sartre, or maybe some Nietzsche. The big picture of Stoicism is one of a Universe charged with awareness and purpose, a human nature within the order of all of Nature, and our own ability to understand and to live well within that whole. I'm not sure that you can practice Stoicism without that core of metaphysics, ethics, and logic. There's no place for cherry-picking."

"But I like the the power part."

"I also have an extra copy of Nietzsche's Twilight of the Idols and The Anti-Christ. Read those works, and then tell me where you stand."

"Can I have the other books too?"

"Wait a bit. Come back when you're ready to move beyond Existentialism. Otherwise those other books will just sit idly on your shelf." 

Stoic Conversations 21

"Do you remember what my last words were supposed to be? I forget. I know I planned them. It was funny then. Seems stupid now. I'm tired. It's dull."

"I remember what they were."

"Were they any good?"

"Yes. They were the best words."

"What were they?"

"Walk with God."

"That'll do. Thanks. . . . Do me a favor, will you?"

"Sure. Anything."

"Can you have someone else say them for me? . . . I'm tired." 

IMAGE: Edvard Munch, At the Deathbed (1895) 

Stoic Conversations 20

"If someone feels something, if it's what his desires tell him he should do, then that's what he should do. It would be wrong to keep anyone from getting what he wants."

"What if I want to rob you? What if I want to expose myself in public parks? What if I want to become an addict? What if I want to throw myself off a building?"

"Don't be silly, those are completely different cases!"

"Why? I may feel like I want to do them. My passions are speaking to me."

"But you may be harming other people, or harming yourself."

"So there is another condition I need to apply? Not just that I want something, but that I should want something that is good for others and for me?"

"Well, yes."

"Then things don't become good just because you desire them, but you should desire then because they are good?"

"Hold on now, who's to say what's good or bad?"

"Quite right, that's a further question, but it is one that requires reason, not just passion."

"I guess I've never thought of it that way, though I feel like I've heard that argument somewhere before."

"Do you know a fellow named Socrates?"

"No, what department is he in?"

Stoic Conversations 19

"Listen bitches, Life is all about money! Get with it!"

"No, life is all about character."

"Who the fuck are you?"

"I'm the guy whose ear you just yelled in, and the guy who ended up with half of your drink in his face."

"Fuck you, faggot."

"Sorry, I couldn't hear you. I'm still wiping your spit out of my ear."

"You want me to kick the shit out of you?"

"Yes, please. That way I can sue you for all that big money you have. You obviously have no character I can learn from."

"I got no time for you, pussy!"

"Of course not. Go buy some more bitches with your big money."

"Whatever!"

IMAGE: What Boston College parents pay for. . .

Stoic Conversations 18

"I don't want to do this anymore. I'm tired. I'm done. Aren't you done?" 

"I feel that way all the time. I feel that way right now. But I'll be done when it comes to me, not when I can still do better. That may be tomorrow, or it may be in twenty years, but I still have a chance to do it right." 

"Shut up! Shut up with your hope! There's no hope!" 

"In what? The situation getting more pleasant? Maybe it will, maybe it won't. Let's assume it won't, just because I assume that all the time. That's not the point. Can you still love? Do that. The rest is bullshit." 

"Goddammit, I hate you." 

"Yes, I know." 

"And I suppose I love you." 

"Yes, I know. And I love you too."

Stoic Conversations 17

"You need to sign this paper, to admit that you personally offended the Vice-President, and to promise you'll never do it again."

"Well, I'm calling him out for 'offending' a dozen women he has sexually abused, so no, I'm not signing your paper."

"I do really like you, but you need to sign this, or otherwise you'll be fired. I don't want to do this."

"Then don't do it. Grow a pair."

"Listen, this is how it's done."

"Okay, where is the right and the wrong in this picture?"

"But you made him look bad, and you need to do what he says. There's no other way around it."

"Exactly what sort of moral universe do you live in?"