.
. . Second, consider what every being is from the seed to the time of its
receiving a soul, and from the reception of a soul to the giving back of the
same, and of what things every being is compounded, and into what things it is
resolved.
—Marcus
Aurelius, Meditations, Book 12.24 (tr
Long)
Remember,
it always looks more powerful and intimidating than it really is. Part of my
own personal Stoic exercises, quite useful at many frustrating times during the
day, involves mentally breaking things down. What are they really made of? What
were they before? What will they very soon become? When I can do this, I am
suddenly not so troubled. I can whistle my way past the highwayman.
“You’re
not so big!” my little daughter would often say, standing up as straight as she
could, whenever she came across something frightening.
I can do
this when the circumstances of the world seem to be rolling over me. They are
what they are, and I still remain what I am. Bodies crash into me, and my
thinking can still remain intact.
I can do
this when I see that someone else is making himself appear to be the king of the
hill. He clothes himself in images, while beneath them he is just another
fragile animal with a brief spark of mind, no different than myself.
I can do
this, most importantly of all, when I begin to take myself far too seriously. I’m
not all I make myself out to be. Most of what I fret over does not matter one
bit, and I recognize it when I break myself down.
It is
all from the same matter, and to the same matter it will return. In the meantime,
it adopts a certain form, a temporary arrangement of that matter, and I
therefore take it to be far more than it actually is. I am impressed by the vanity, but I should remember what is base. This vanity is something I add in my
own estimation, and not what is actually there.
I still
have a very vivid memory of some of my students, having just attended Ash
Wednesday Mass, sitting about before class, and bragging about how special this
made them.
“It’s so
sad that more students didn’t receive the ashes! They don’t know how blessed it
would make them!”
I tried
to bite my tongue, but I said it in any event. “You do know what the ashes
represent, right?”
“Of
course, it’s a sign that we’re Catholic, and that we should be proud of our
Faith, that we are chosen.”
“Memento, homo, quia pulvis es, et in pulverem
reverteris.”
“What?”
Didn’t you just hear those words at
Mass?”
“Well, I don’t know Latin, so. . . “
“Remember, man, that you are dust, and
to dust you shall return."
I was
met only with empty stares.
“Yes,
you may be special, but you’re also just made of dirt.”
Written in 9/2009
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