Wipe
out your imaginations by often saying to yourself:
Now
it is in my power to let no badness be in this soul, nor desire, nor any
perturbation at all; but looking at all things I see what is their nature, and
I use each according to its value.
Remember
this power that you have from Nature.
—Marcus
Aurelius, Meditations, Book 8 (tr
Long)
The mind will
sometimes become cluttered, or build up a thick residue, the accumulation of
too many diversions, a disordered mess of vivid impressions and gripping
illusions. Whenever I am beginning to be mastered by my desires and fears more
than I am the master of them, it’s time for a good housecleaning.
This hardly
needs to be seen as a chore, but can become a profound relief, the lifting of a
burden or the clearing of a clouded vision.
What is it
that’s getting in the way? All sorts of imaginings, whether dark or alluring,
that I am confusing with what is real. I am confronted with a memory, and it
may seem too much to bear, or I am grabbed by a passion, and it may appear too
strong to resist, or I am worried about what may still come, and it may be
telling me that there is no good way out.
This is all
quite misleading, because nothing will have power over my own judgment, unless
I decide to let it do so. What is so overwhelming about that recollection, or
longing, or terror? Something may alter my circumstances, or hinder my body,
but my mind has rule over itself, and can determine for itself whether a
situation is an obstacle or an opportunity.
The trick
behind the housecleaning is actually quite simple, though I will often make it
more difficult for myself than it has to be. I can look at what is troubling
me, and I can distinguish between what it is within itself, and what it is that
I have chosen to make of it. I will usually find that the difference between
these two is quite great.
Now I can toss
aside what I have imagined, and be left with the reality. It will now not feel
so painful, or irresistible, or inevitable. Within Nature, it plays its
rightful part, and if I can accept it for what it is, I can come to terms with
it. How can I now make this useful for the strength of my own virtue? Each and
every state of affairs provides me with that option.
There are all
sorts of things well beyond my control, but how I choose to think about
something, and therefore to determine what it will mean to me, is not one of
those things.
I can remember
that whenever I clean the junk out of the old attic, and get rid of the old
baggage.
Written in 4/2008
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