Now
turn your thoughts to the other kinds of men. To that place then we must
remove, where there are so many great orators, and so many noble philosophers, Heraclitus,
Pythagoras, Socrates. So many heroes of former days, and so many generals after
them, and tyrants. Besides these, Eudoxus, Hipparchus, Archimedes, and other
men of acute natural talents, great minds, lovers of labor, versatile,
confident, mockers even of the perishable and ephemeral life of man, as
Menippus and such as are like him.
As
to all these, consider that they have long been in the dust. What harm then is
this to them, and what to those whose names are altogether unknown?
One
thing here is worth a great deal, to pass your life in truth and
justice, with a benevolent disposition even to liars and unjust men.
—Marcus
Aurelius, Meditations, Book 6 (tr
Long)
Some people might be famous for
their various skills and achievements. Other people might be infamous for their
various weaknesses and failures. Most of us are hardly thought of or remembered
at all, and the qualities we so hoped would define us will be of no
significance at all. The ornaments and trappings of life should never be confused
with its true purpose and content.
Now a man might possess the gift of
fine speech, or have an insightful mind, or be a conqueror on the field of
battle, or be talented in ruling others. He may be quick to win a name for
himself, and he may raise himself in power and influence.
None of this will make any
difference at all, if it is not in the service, first and foremost, of being a good
man. Integrity, fairness, and compassion will make all the difference, because
they themselves are about the living, not about the conditions in which one
lives.
I would always pride myself in not
being impressed by people who simply looked attractive, or who were rich, or
who were popular. Yet I would still let myself be drawn in by various other
characteristics, such as a sense of wit, taste, or charm, and then I would
wonder why I still wasn’t finding genuine friends. I may not have been falling
for the usual traps, only a slightly less trendy set of traps. I was confusing
qualities with character, swapping the attributes people had with the virtues
of what they did.
I would then sometimes blame others
for being selfish, deceptive, or thoughtless, when I only needed to take
responsibility for myself in thinking they would somehow be giving, honest, and
concerned, just because they happened to be smart or amusing. People will make
their own choices for themselves, and it isn’t my place to make those decisions
for them. But it most certainly is my place to stand by my own conscience, to
admire and respect others for the right reasons.
It never came to me in a single
moment, but I slowly began to realize that I was never going to be admired,
respected, or listened to in this world. The things that interested me, and the
values I thought best in life, were just not what most others cared for.
Sometimes I might have felt angry with that, because it didn’t seem fair, or I
might have felt sad about it, because I wished people could understand.
But it doesn’t need to breed
resentment, and it doesn’t need to be a tragedy. I will only be worried about
fortune and fame if I still think they are important in life. If I can only
recognize that living well is simply good for the sake of living well, and
nothing else above and beyond it, I won’t be caught up in the externals and the
diversions.
It is a liberation, and not a
burden, to understand what things in life are really worth, and to leave behind
the charms of appearance for the merits of virtue.
Written in 7/2007
IMAGE: Lorenzo Lotto, Allegory of Virtue and Vice (1505)
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