On
every occasion we must have these thoughts at hand,
'Lead me, O Zeus, and lead me, Destiny,
Whither ordained is by your decree.
I'll follow, doubting not, or if with
will
Recreant I falter, I shall follow
still.'
-Cleanthes
of Assos
'Who
rightly with necessity complies
In
things divine we count him skilled and wise.'
-Euripides, Fragment 965
'Well,
Crito, if this be the gods’ will, so be it.'
-Plato, Crito, 43d
'Anytus
and Meletus have power to put me to death, but not to harm me.'
-Plato, Apology, 30c
—Epictetus,
The Handbook, Chapter 53 (tr
Matheson)
The Handbook ends with these four quotations,
and I suggest that we will only understand them, and why Epictetus chose them,
if we apply the overall lesson of the entire text, a reflection upon the things
in our power.
Appeals
to the gods and to fate would often leave me cold, perhaps because they placed
all things in forces I could not perceive, or perhaps because they made me look
irrelevant in the order of all things. Indeed, it often seemed that being
subsumed into an impersonal whole, left powerless and without hope, was the
root of so many of my troubles. Whenever things didn't go the way I wanted, I
would far too readily wallow in despair.
There
seemed to only be two options, to conquer the world or to be conquered by the
world. Either it would have to be all about me, or I would have to be
completely useless and disposable. The selfishness of the former disgusted me,
and the pain of the latter terrified me.
The
go-getters and achievers told me I needed to shape all other things to my will,
and to never look back. This was sadly the attitude of the lost love of my
life.
Fatalists,
often of a certain religious sort, told me I just needed to blindly surrender
myself to God, and to take my hands off the wheel. This was sadly the attitude
of my lost friends during the Wilderness Years.
As is so
often the case, I did not see the mean between the extremes. Stoicism helped me
to understand that my own choices and actions did not exist apart from the
order of all things, but rather existed within that order.
I began
to see that the plan of Nature, of Providence, of God, in whatever way you wish
to conceive it, was not something distant or invisible. I could see it right in
front of me each and every day, in the simple fact that all things act for
purpose, and that all situations and events have immediate meaning, if only we
so choose to recognize it.
I began
to see that my own existence was hardly insignificant, and no more or less important
than anything else on the face of this Earth. Yet I only grasped this when I
saw all the parts in harmony with the whole, instead of opposing the parts and
the whole. I did not need to be forced, kicking and screaming, into the
fullness of all things as they were. I could instead give my free and joyful
“yes” to the world, and then also agree to assist in that wonderful beauty.
Destiny
did not exclude me. Destiny had always been inviting me to share myself through
my own choice. Providence was never a static thing, but a constant unfolding,
and each of us has a part that is asked of us.
Zeus,
for Cleanthes the personification of Providence, never trampled on my freedom.
Instead, he asked me to share in his power. I could learn to work with things,
and not against them, while still being my own master. In my own daily
thinking, this became something akin to a Tao of Stoicism.
If and
when, especially when, I fail, out of my selfishness or cowardice, new pathways
always reveal themselves. These are not written in the distant heavens, but to
be found in the most immediate and humble ways. When I am too angry, Nature
provides me direct means to find peace. When I feel hate, Nature offers me
myriad ways to love. When I abandon hope, Nature always throws me a lifeline.
Even
when I struggle and squirm, and I continue to resist, my very resistance
becomes, by wonderful means, an opportunity for the greater good. The greater
good need never exclude the lower, but it will always find a way to include it.
When
Socrates tells us that we must accept the will of the gods, he is not
advocating defeatism. What seems to some such a great weakness is, in fact, a
much greater strength. I need only return to the opening chapter of The Handbook. It is when I can distinguish
between what is rightly within my power, and what is rightly outside of it,
that I will find my proper place.
The
world will unfold as it will unfold. I do not always immediately know why it
does so, but my reason can determine that it is always for a purpose. Nature
does not act in vain. It isn’t my place to be a ruler of Nature, but to be a
participant in Nature.
This
is exactly why Socrates understood that Anytus and Meletus could never harm him,
even if they could kill him. I must be willing to surrender anything and
everything that is beyond my power, but I can never lose that one piece, that
essential piece, that is exclusively mine. You may choose to be a bad man, but
you will never force me to be a bad man. Nature is invincible, and I am also
invincible, whenever I freely share in Nature. That is within my power.
Written in 4/1998
No comments:
Post a Comment