Well, I had much ado to persuade that friend to change his mind. But it is impossible to move some of the men of today, so that I think that I know now what I did not know before, the meaning of the familiar saying, “A fool is not to be persuaded nor broken of his folly.”
May it never be my lot to have for friend a wise fool: nothing is more difficult to handle.
“I have decided.”
So have the madmen, but the more firmly they persist in false judgements the more hellebore do they require. Will you not act as the sick man should, and call in the physician?
As he says, “I am sick, master; help me: consider what I ought to do, it is for me to obey you”, so you should say, “I do not know what I ought to do, but I have come to learn.”
Oh no, you say: “Talk to me about other things; this I have decided.”
Other things indeed! What is greater or more to your advantage than that you should be convinced that it is not sufficient to have decided and to refuse all change of mind? This is the firmness of madness, not of health.
May it never be my lot to have for friend a wise fool: nothing is more difficult to handle.
“I have decided.”
So have the madmen, but the more firmly they persist in false judgements the more hellebore do they require. Will you not act as the sick man should, and call in the physician?
As he says, “I am sick, master; help me: consider what I ought to do, it is for me to obey you”, so you should say, “I do not know what I ought to do, but I have come to learn.”
Oh no, you say: “Talk to me about other things; this I have decided.”
Other things indeed! What is greater or more to your advantage than that you should be convinced that it is not sufficient to have decided and to refuse all change of mind? This is the firmness of madness, not of health.
—from Epictetus, Discourses 2.15
I will often hear people reducing a poor decision to a mere lack of intelligence, with phrases such as “dumber than a box of rocks” or “you can’t fix stupid”. I have recently discovered how in the South, there can be nothing kinder, and also nothing more condescending, than exclaiming “Bless your heart!”
Now I understand that we tend to use words casually, and that we should not split hairs over colloquialisms, but I will protest if someone hastily insists on equating folly with idiocy. While we are all gifted with different degrees of intellectual skills, and some of us are challenged by disabilities beyond our control, a man does not become good because his is a genius, or bad because he is a dunce—the difference arises from the depth of our deliberate concern, regardless of any IQ scores.
Some of the best folks I have known were dismissed for being dull, and some of the worst folks I have known were celebrated for being clever. Whatever the mental capacity, it is a caring and humble attitude that builds genuine character, for anyone is able to form a sound judgment, within the limits of what nature has provided to him. The quickest or the flashiest solution is not necessarily the wisest or the most loving; slow and steady wins the race.
No, I do not suffer a fool gladly, if by foolishness we mean a willful refusal to think with clarity and integrity. It isn’t that the fool can’t reason, but rather that he won’t reason, choosing to begin with his preferred conclusion, instead of arriving at an uncomfortable conclusion through his own hard deliberation. As the Thomist might say, one may cast blame for vincible ignorance, not for invincible ignorance.
It is indeed a sort of madness when I close my mind to some inconvenient truth, though the insanity is something I freely invited, by making my immediate desire the final measure. However mortifying they felt, the most fruitful moments of my life were always the ones where I finally adapted my wants to fit my needs. I refused to talk it over while I was obdurate, and the fever only lifted once I made that painful admission: “I don’t know. Help me to work this out.”
Don’t get caught up in being “smart” or “educated”, which is often no more than an excuse for being headstrong. An open mind will bend without breaking.
I will often hear people reducing a poor decision to a mere lack of intelligence, with phrases such as “dumber than a box of rocks” or “you can’t fix stupid”. I have recently discovered how in the South, there can be nothing kinder, and also nothing more condescending, than exclaiming “Bless your heart!”
Now I understand that we tend to use words casually, and that we should not split hairs over colloquialisms, but I will protest if someone hastily insists on equating folly with idiocy. While we are all gifted with different degrees of intellectual skills, and some of us are challenged by disabilities beyond our control, a man does not become good because his is a genius, or bad because he is a dunce—the difference arises from the depth of our deliberate concern, regardless of any IQ scores.
Some of the best folks I have known were dismissed for being dull, and some of the worst folks I have known were celebrated for being clever. Whatever the mental capacity, it is a caring and humble attitude that builds genuine character, for anyone is able to form a sound judgment, within the limits of what nature has provided to him. The quickest or the flashiest solution is not necessarily the wisest or the most loving; slow and steady wins the race.
No, I do not suffer a fool gladly, if by foolishness we mean a willful refusal to think with clarity and integrity. It isn’t that the fool can’t reason, but rather that he won’t reason, choosing to begin with his preferred conclusion, instead of arriving at an uncomfortable conclusion through his own hard deliberation. As the Thomist might say, one may cast blame for vincible ignorance, not for invincible ignorance.
It is indeed a sort of madness when I close my mind to some inconvenient truth, though the insanity is something I freely invited, by making my immediate desire the final measure. However mortifying they felt, the most fruitful moments of my life were always the ones where I finally adapted my wants to fit my needs. I refused to talk it over while I was obdurate, and the fever only lifted once I made that painful admission: “I don’t know. Help me to work this out.”
Don’t get caught up in being “smart” or “educated”, which is often no more than an excuse for being headstrong. An open mind will bend without breaking.
—Reflection written in 9/2001
IMAGE: Hieronymus Bosch, The Ship of Fools (c. 1500)
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