Parliamentary Snuff

I have decided I wish to become a Member of Parliament, but not because that would make me a big boss, or a wheeler and dealer who could tell other people how to live. 

No, I would very much like access to the Parliamentary Snuff Box, allowing me free use of the finest British snuff, whenever it tickles my fancy. 

Way back in 1694, Parliament banned smoking in its chambers, and I suppose this was probably a good idea. Regardless of the health issues, I can only imagine the horror of a small room filled with hundreds of men puffing away at their pipes. 

One should never smoke good tobacco while engaging in politics. 

As a sort of compensation, it was decided that the members could enjoy their snuff instead, and a tradition began where the Principal Doorkeeper of the House held a snuff box from which all could partake of freely. My understanding is that this gentleman, and a gentleman he surely must be, pays for this courtesy from his own pocket. The tradition survives to this day. 

In America, the term "snuff" usually means wet snuff, a form of dipping tobacco, which is put in the mouth, like the rougher cut chewing tobacco, something my Texas friends call "chaw". 

No, the classier version, dry snuff, is a finely ground powder, and it is sniffed into the nose. No, not snorted, but sniffed. It has a deeply dignified history. Napoleon annoyed his servants by constantly leaving it all over his clothing, and trails of it all over the floor. Queen Charlotte, the wife of George III, apparently had a whole room dedicated to her snuff collection. 

A good dry snuff takes on qualities similar to a fine wine or a proper whiskey. To partake of it can become a profound ritual; the experience becomes almost transcendent. A tiny pinch is like an explosion of flavor. 

You won't find much of it here in the States, however, and Big Brother has decided that we also can't order it by mail. It is an evil thing, mind you, and you'd best avoid anything you enjoy, unless the authorities approve of it. Naughty boy!

I love an SP snuff, where bergamot, the same taste as in Earl Grey tea, is dominant. Other versions have menthol, or a fruitiness, or a rich smokiness, like Toast or Scotch snuff. I do like the nicotine kick, but that is not the point of it, just like the buzz isn't the point in a glass of decent port. 

You say it is outdated and irrelevant, and I say it is something I still love, regardless of the fashions. It all comes around again.