Of a low estimation of self in the sight of God
1. I will speak unto my Lord who am but dust and ashes. If I count
myself more, behold You stand against me, and my iniquities
bear true testimony, and I cannot gainsay it. But if I abase
myself, and bring myself to nothing, and shrink from all
self-esteem, and grind myself to dust, which I am, Your grace will
be favorable unto me, and Your light will be near unto my heart;
and all self-esteem, how little soever it be, shall be swallowed
up in the depths of my nothingness, and shall perish forever.
There You show to me myself, what I am, what I was, and
whither I have come: so foolish was I and ignorant. If I am
left to myself, behold I am nothing, I am all weakness; but if
suddenly You look upon me, immediately I am made strong, and
filled with new joy. And it is a great marvel that I am so
suddenly lifted up, and so graciously embraced by You, since I
am always being carried to the deep by my own weight.
2. This is the doing of Your love which freely goes before me and succors me in so many necessities, which guards me also in
great dangers and snatches me, as I may truly say, from
innumerable evils. For verily, by loving myself amiss, I lost
myself, and by seeking and sincerely loving You alone, I found
both myself and You, and through love I have brought myself to
yet deeper nothingness: because You, O most sweet Lord, deal
with me beyond all merit, and above all which I dare ask or
think.
3. Blessed be You, O my God, because though I be unworthy of all Your benefits, Your bountiful and infinite goodness never ceases
to do good even to ingrates and to those who are turned far from You. Turn us unto Yourself, that we may be grateful,
humble, and godly, for You are our salvation, our courage, and
our strength.
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