Then
I answered: “I confess that I think it is justly said that vicious men keep
only the outward bodily form of their humanity, and, in the attributes of their
souls, are changed to beasts. But I would never have allowed them willingly the
power to rage in the ruin of good men through their fierce and wicked
intentions.”
“They
have not that power,” said she, “as I will show you at a convenient time. But
if this very power, which you believe is allowed to them, were taken from them,
the punishment of vicious men would be to a great extent lightened. For, though
some may scarcely believe it, evil men must be more unhappy when they carry out
their ill desires than when they cannot fulfill them. For if it is pitiable to
have wished bad things, it is more pitiable to have had the power to perform
them, without which power the performance of this pitiable will would never
have effect.
“Thus,
when you see men with the will and the power to commit a crime, and you see
them perform it, they must be the victims of a threefold misfortune, since each
of those three things brings its own misery.”
“Yes,”
I said, “I agree; but I do wish from my heart that they may speedily be rid of
one of these misfortunes, being deprived of this power of doing evil.”
“They
will be rid of it,” she said, “more speedily even than you wish perhaps, and
sooner than they think they will be rid thereof. There is in the short course
of life nothing that is so long coming that an immortal mind can think it has
long to wait for it. Many a time are their high hopes and great plans for
evil-doing cut short by a sudden and unlooked-for end. This indeed it is that
sets a limit to their misery. For if wickedness makes a man miserable, the
longer he is wicked, the more miserable must he be; and I should hold them most
miserable of all, if not even death at last put an end to their evil-doing. If
we have reached true conclusions concerning the unhappiness of depravity, the
misery, which is said to be eternal, can have no limit.”
—from
Book 4, Prose 4
Yes, men
will not only act like beasts, but they will actually become beasts. It doesn’t
even require times of war or famine to bring that out in us, because you can
see it on any given day, in the most ordinary of circumstances.
I still
have a horrifying memory of watching a colleague being fired from her job by
our mighty boss. I was asked to sit there and observe the whole thing, since I
was nominally in charge of her department. Her only crime was that the Dean’s
wife had taken a strong personal dislike to her, and this meant that she would
no longer be of any use to the fine institution.
“You
see, we’re like a family here, but we can’t be a family when some people don’t
do what they’re supposed to do. It’s nothing personal, but we won’t be renewing
your contract.”
Of
course it’s personal; as soon it involves the lives of people, it’s automatically
personal. There are no families when love succumbs to preference.
She was
disposable to others, to be dismissed at a moment’s notice, thanks to the
pettiness of pride. Did no one remember that her husband had also just lost his
job due to corporate “downsizing”? Did no one remember that her son was sick,
and needed the health insurance she was now going to lose? Did no one remember
that she had always done her work with diligence, conviction, and character?
No, her need and merit were not in question; merely the satisfaction of vanity
was in question.
My
horror came not only from having to cringe my way through the whole sordid
affair, acting as some sort of twisted witness, but from my own cowardice in
not defending her more adamantly at the time. Was the Dean an animal? Yes,
because he was consumed by hatred. Was I an animal? Yes, because I was consumed
by fear.
And I
deserved every little bit of guilt and shame that came to me from it, just as that
pompous bigwig deserved to rot in hell right next to me. When a man can no
longer follow the dictates of right conscience, he is no longer a man. He has
lost his right to that title.
Boethius
is beginning to understand that those who live with evil in their hearts are
ultimately consumed by that evil. Yet he still worries that such people
continue to do harm, as my boss did harm with his action, and as I did harm by
my inaction. It concerns me when others get away with their dirty deeds, and it
concerns me even more when I get away with my own dirty deeds.
But
there we go again, caught up in our old habits. We look at the harm folks do,
thinking only of how we are oppressed. We assume others get away with everything,
forgetting that there is nothing for them to gain. Wicked men die in their own
wickedness; now might we instead live in our own excellence?
Why do
the vicious still have the ability to do what they do? How could a loving God
possibly permit it? Because love includes within it justice, not as vengeance,
but as giving to all people what is their due. God will give us exactly what we want. If I can remember that, I will no
longer complain about anyone getting away with anything. If virtue is its own
reward, and vice is its own punishment, then no further judgment is necessary.
Once
again, I remind myself that I have known many nasty types, the liars, the cheaters,
or the abusers, and for all the glory they may say they have won, I have never
known a single one of them to be happy.
They are
always anxious, grasping, and incomplete. The very fact that they always want
more is proof that they are in need and in pain. It all goes beyond my personal
observations, and goes to the fact that a man without virtue is like fish out
of water.
“But
aren’t you in need and pain as well?” Well yes, I most certainly am. And so I
need to finally fix myself. The only pride I can find right now is in knowing
that, and in knowing what I must finally do.
Why
can’t we remove the evil in this world more quickly? Let me think of it a bit
differently than I have before. Seen from a larger perspective, it all will
pass quite soon, as all worldly things will pass.
Does the
tyrant tell you that he will rule forever? Laugh and smile, because he will die
shortly, even if he takes you out first. Does the oppressor think himself
invincible? His power will fade, and his flesh will rot, because you will both
end up in the exact same grave.
What
will be the only difference? The dignity of how we live, while we still live,
will be the only difference. Rest assured that if you choose to live with
decency, with wisdom and with love, that will always be your own, and no one else
can take it from you.
Will another
hate you? Quite likely, but rest assured that he is already stewing in his own
juices. He only wants to take something from you because he is so lacking
within himself.
What he
suffers for his crimes is already more than enough of a burden for him, just as
the joy of your own character is already more than enough of a blessing for you.
Written in 11/2015
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