How a desolate man ought to commit himself into the hands of God
1. O Lord, Holy Father, be You blessed now and evermore; because as You will so it is done, and what You do is good. Let Your servant rejoice in You, not in himself, nor in any other; because You alone are the true joy, You are my hope and my crown, You are my joy and my honor, O Lord. What has Your servant, which he received not from You, even without merit of his own? Yours are all things which You have given, and which You have made. I am poor and in misery even from my youth up, and my soul is sorrowful unto tears, sometimes also it is disquieted within itself, because of the sufferings which are coming upon it.
2. I long after the joy of peace; for the peace of Your children do I beseech, for in the light of Your comfort they are fed by You. If You give peace, if You pour into me holy joy, the soul of Your servant shall be full of melody, and devout in Your praise. But if You withdraw Yourself as too often You are wont, he will not be able to run in the way of Your commandments, but rather he will smite his breast and will bow his knees; because it is not with him as yesterday and the day before, when Your candle shined upon his head, and he walked under the shadow of Your wings, from the temptations which beset him.
3. O Father, righteous and ever to be praised, the hour comes when Your servant is to be proved. O beloved Father, it is well that in this hour Your servant suffers somewhat for Your sake. O Father, evermore to be adored, as the hour comes which You foreknew from everlasting, when for a little while Your servant should outwardly bow down, but always live inwardly with You; when for a little while he should be little regarded, humbled, and fail in the eyes of men; should be wasted with sufferings and weaknesses, to rise again with You in the dawn of the new light, and be glorified in the heavenly places. O Holy Father, you have ordained it so, and so have willed it; and that is done which You Yourself have commanded.
4. For this is Your favor to Your friend, that he should suffer and be troubled in the world for Your love’s sake, how often soever, and by whomsoever and whosoever You have suffered it to be done. Without Your counsel and providence, and without cause, nothing comes to pass on the earth. It is good for me, Lord, that I have been in trouble, that I may learn Your statutes, and may cast away all pride of heart and presumption. It is profitable for me that confusion has covered my face, that I may seek to You for consolation rather than unto men. By this also I have learned to dread Your unsearchable judgment, who afflicts the just with the wicked, but not without equity and justice.
5. Thanks be unto You, because You have not spared my sins, but have beaten me with stripes of love, inflicting pains, and sending troubles upon me without and within. There is none who can console me, of all things which are under heaven, but You only, O Lord my God, You heavenly Physician of souls, who does scourge and has mercy, who leads down to hell and brings up again. Your discipline over me, and Your rod itself shall teach me.
6. Behold, O beloved Father, I am in Your hands, I bow myself under the rod of Your correction. Smite my back and my neck that I may bend my crookedness to Your will. Make me a pious and lowly disciple, as You were wont to be kind, that I may walk according to every nod of Yours. To You I commend myself and all that I have for correction; better is it to be punished here than hereafter. You know all things and each of them; and nothing remains hid from You in man’s conscience. Before they are, You know that they will be, and You need not that any man teach You or admonish You concerning the things which are done upon the earth. You know what is expedient for my profit, and how greatly trouble serves unto the scrubbing off the rust of sin. Do with me according to Your desired good pleasure, and despise not my life which is full of sin, known to none so entirely and fully as to You alone.
7. Grant me, O Lord, to know that which ought to be known; to love that which ought to be loved; to praise that which pleases You most, to esteem that which is precious in Your sight, to blame that which is vile in Your eyes. Suffer me not to judge according to the sight of bodily eyes, nor to give sentence according to the hearing of the ears of ignorant men; but to discern in true judgment between visible and spiritual things, and above all things to be ever seeking after the will of Your good pleasure.
8. Oftentimes the senses of men are deceived in judging; the lovers of the world also are deceived in that they love only visible things. What is a man better because by man he is reckoned very great? The deceiver deceives the deceiver, the vain man the vain, the blind man the blind, the weak man the weak, when they exalt one another; and in truth they rather put to shame, while they foolishly praise. For as humble St. Francis says, “What each one is in Your eyes, so much he is, and no more.”
IMAGE: Franz Anton Maulbertsch, Divine Providence and the Virtues (c. 1765)
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