But if a man studies logic and goes to the philosophers just because he wants to show at a dinner party that he knows hypothetical arguments, is he not merely trying to win the admiration of some senator who sits next him?
For in such society the great forces of the world prevail, and what we call wealth here seems child's play there.
This is what makes it difficult to get the mastery over one's impressions, where distracting forces are strong.
I know a man who clung to the knees of Epaphroditus in tears and said he was in distress, for he had nothing left but a million and a half.
What did Epaphroditus do? Did he laugh at him, as we should?
No, he was astonished, and said, “Unhappy man, however did you manage to keep silence and endure it?"
—from Epictetus, Discourses 1.26
Such an appeal, however, will only carry weight if it is driven by a view of philosophy as the actual love of wisdom, not as a clever way to manipulate the appearance of wisdom out of a desire for fame and fortune.
Am I asking these questions in order to impress, to put on a show for an audience, or am I seeking to become a more understanding and loving human being, regardless of who might be watching? Perhaps I can fool others, at least for a time, but I can’t hide from my own motives.
I always return to the insight that philosophy is not merely a lifestyle choice, or an accessory to improve my image, or some tool for boosting a career. No, it is itself a way of living, a radical transformation of attitude where values are based upon critical reflection instead of lazy assumptions.
Once this process takes hold, the world will feel as if it has been turned upside down, and what once seemed acceptable will now seem insane. The big becomes small, and the small becomes big. The grasping man thinks of the virtues as a nuisance, while the searching man is no longer ruled by externals.
Observe how the man engrossed with the world is distressed by the plunging value of his portfolio, and the man caring for his soul is busy with the shortcomings of his character—here is the true difference between bondage and freedom.
In whatever ways philosophy does her work, regardless of the particular schools and traditions that come into play, self-awareness inevitably leads to a liberation from the vagaries of circumstance. I can now ask about who I am and what I ought to do, rather than being at the mercy of who others say I am and what they decide to do.
At any given moment, I am faced with a wave of impressions, immensely varied and constantly changing. Some are violent, and some are subtle; some pull me this way, and some push me that way. Without a discipline of mind and will, I am likely to be swept away—philosophy permits me to discern their meaning and direct their force.
Epaphroditus was the “owner” of Epictetus, and yet he seemed to struggle with an ownership over himself. The roles of master and slave are oddly reversed here, where one fellow thinks it unbearable to lose some money, and the other can laugh it off.
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