Yes, your leg.
“But he will cut off.”
What? Your neck. But what will he fail to bind or cut off? Your will.
That is why the men of old enjoined “Know yourself.”
What follows? You ought to practice in small things and go on from them to greater.
“I have a headache.”
Then do not say, “Ah me!”
“I have an earache.”
Do not say, “Ah me!”
And I do not mean that you may not groan, but do not groan in spirit.
And if the boy brings you your leg bands slowly, do not cry out loud and pull a long face and say, “Everyone hates me.”
I may be swept up in a panic, desperately worried that I must now surrender all the things that give me pleasure, cornered in by the constant stress of resigning myself to less. I tremble at the thought of tedious self-denial. How can this be happiness?
No, I am approaching it from the wrong angle. A perception of gains and losses depends upon the ultimate measure of what is good and bad for human nature. Do I believe that acquisitions on the outside or a formation on the inside ought to have priority? Am I to be ruled by things or to master myself? This is the judgment that determines everything else.
Where I care first for external appearances, of course it will seem as if self-reliance is a terrible burden. Where I care first for internal character, however, I will recognize that an indifference to circumstances is a genuine liberation. What looked like far less is actually far more.
As Franz Jägerstätter said, it is better for my hands to be in chains than for my will to be in chains. I don’t necessarily control the former, while I do control the latter.
Indeed, how can another man, or any worldly event, damage what is exclusively my own? Not even death can do that, if I face my end with conviction and integrity. If I were to make a list of all the things I fear, which could be a massive book in its own right, how many of them are about my actions, and how many of them are about the actions of others?
Am I drawing that critical line between what others might do and what I should do?
“They could put me in irons, or even chop off various bits of me! I might have an agonizing pain in my head, or in my ear, or in any number of places!”
Yes, to whatever degree, we will all face such hardships. Now which parts can be affected, and which parts can remain immune? I will feel pain, and I am likely to cry out, though I am not required to abandon my conscience; the core of me can, in fact, become stronger as the lesser pieces are made weaker.
To truly know myself is to find the greatest joy in simply being understanding and loving. The only surrender is to the greater harmony of Providence. There is no resignation, just affirmation. The self is not to be denied, it is to be celebrated.
Speaking of Blsd. Franz, did you ever watch A Hidden Life?
ReplyDeleteYes, we saw it as soon as it was available on blu-ray. It is so incredibly powerful, it is hard to describe in mere words. None of us have yet been able to write up anything about it that doesn't fall flat. Brigid's account was probably the best: "You need to sit through the whole thing, and then lie awake for the whole night wondering about how some people can manage to be so bad, and some people can manage to be so good."
ReplyDeleteI actually haven't seen it yet...it seems intimidating for some reason (Silence was sort of the same, though I did finally see that and was glad I did). I'm going to need to make the time now.
DeleteI'm really glad to hear it does him justice. He actually popped back into my radar at a time where I really needed to hear his story not too long ago.