Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.50

Think continually how many physicians are dead after often contracting their eyebrows over the sick; and how many astrologers after predicting with great pretensions the deaths of others; and how many philosophers after endless discourses on death or immortality; how many heroes after killing thousands; and how many tyrants who have used their power over men's lives with terrible insolence as if they were immortal; and how many cities are entirely dead, so to speak, Helike, and Pompeii, and Herculaneum, and others innumerable.

Add to the reckoning all whom you have known, one after another. One man after burying another has been laid out dead, and another buries him. And all of this in a short time.

To conclude, always observe how ephemeral and worthless human things are, and what was yesterday a little mucus tomorrow will be a mummy or ashes.

Pass then through this little space of time conformably to Nature, and end your journey in contentment, just as an olive falls off when it is ripe, blessing nature who produced it, and thanking the tree on which it grew.

—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 4 (tr Long)

This is the sort of passage that may seem depressing to some. If it all passes away, what is any of it worth? Only one aspect of life is worthy, that of living comfortably with Nature, at any point, whatever the circumstances, however long it may last. The rest need not trouble me if I have that one goal constantly in mind.

I don’t mean having my fun, or pursuing my pleasure at the expense of others. I don’t mean getting rich, regardless of who I might end up stepping on or discarding. I don’t mean making a name for myself, however much I must lie and cheat to do so.

I mean acting with integrity, with a sincere care for how I should respect myself, and thereby respect others who are exactly like myself.  We are all made for that same end.

Mount Vesuvius erupted in 79 AD, killing thousands in Pompeii and Herculaneum. Further back, in 373 BC, an earthquake and tidal wave completely destroyed the Greek city of Helike, with untold lost. Were all of these lives useless, and were all of their achievements wasted?

Define achievement, and define waste.

Imagine how the man who had committed his whole life to getting all the gratification he could, or making money, or improving his name, or finding political power must have felt as the burning ashes rained down, or the waters swept him away.

Now imagine what a decent man, the man who defined himself by his character, who only offered love and concern to his neighbors for all of his life, regardless of his position, felt at that same point.

The difference would be like night and day. One would surely die with fear and dread, and the other could die with acceptance and contentment.

Death will indeed come to us all. What matters is what we do in the time, however long or short, that is offered. Do we try to improve ourselves, or try to improve our station?

Someone once told me that life was about grabbing all you could out there, and being strong enough to get it. I instinctively knew this to be wrong. Life isn’t about getting anything at all out there, but about being strong enough to get a hold of myself in here. I have only a fleeting moment to live well, and adding anything out there will not make me any better.

We’ll all be ash, like those corpses at Pompeii. Now did I manage to seek truth and justice, before I become that ash?

Instead of grasping to possess more, I could be like a grateful olive. What a wonderful image.

Written in 2/2006