Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 4.13

A man should always have these two rules in readiness:

The one, is to do only whatever the reason of the ruling and legislating faculty may suggest for the use of men.

The other, is to change your opinion, if there is anyone at hand who sets you right and moves you from any opinion.

But this change of opinion must proceed only from a certain persuasion, as of what is just or of common advantage, and the like, not because it appears pleasant or brings reputation.

—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 4 (tr Long)

Just as I face a dangerous extreme of surrendering my self-reliance to the judgments of others, I also face an equally dangerous extreme of twisting my sense of self-reliance into nothing more than a close-minded arrogance.  I should hold firm to a principle because I am convinced that it is true and good, not assume that is it true and good because I happen to hold firm to it.

A closely connected wisdom is the advice from St. Thomas Aquinas that I do my best to regularly commit to and share with others: I should always follow my conscience, but I should also make certain my conscience is informed.

It can be difficult to distinguish when I am being principled, and when I am just being stubborn or obsequious. It certainly helps when I look to the example of others. If I see someone who is gladly willing to change his mind when faced with sound reasoning, and will thus alter his perspective without conflict or resentment, I am very likely to be in the presence of someone I can look to for inspiration.

If however, I find myself confronted by a totally inflexible mind, or a mind that is so flexible that it bends with every trend or fashion, I should exercise the greatest care. In either case, I must wonder whether a commitment follows from the love of wisdom and virtue, or from an attachment to gratification, self-importance or popularity.

If I am truly honest with myself, I can discern the same things in my own motives. It is often just as easy to lie to myself as it is to lie to others, but I only need to examine my intentions as if no one else is looking, and as if I have no need to impress myself. I can begin to practice some integrity when I remove all the images and distractions from a discernment of my own character.

Why am I doing this? All sorts of justifications, excuses, and extraordinary circumstances may rush into my thinking, and the fact that they rush, and that they like to be so loud, is one sure sign that I should be wary of them.

No. Why am I really doing this? I can carefully work my way through the illusions to the reality. If there is even a hint of concern for saving face, or for making an impression, or for gaining any sort of power over fleeting and shallow things, I need to look elsewhere.

How will my thinking and my actions benefit my own virtue, or encourage the virtue of others? It needs to be about what is right, not about what is vain or convenient. 

Written in 7/2005

Image: Antonio de Pereda , Allegory of Vanity (c. 1632)