Epictetus, Discourses 1.5.2

Now there are two ways in which a man may be thus hardened: one when his reasoning faculty is petrified, and the other when his moral sense is petrified, and he sets himself deliberately not to assent to manifest arguments, and not to abandon what conflicts with them. 

 

Now most of us fear the deadening of the body and would take all possible means to avoid such a calamity, yet we take no heed of the deadening of the mind and the spirit. 

 

When the mind itself is in such a state that a man can follow nothing and understand nothing, we do indeed think that he is in a bad condition; yet, if a man's sense of shame and self-respect is deadened, we even go so far as to call him “a strong man”.

 

There can come a point where I might get terribly confused by all the brightness and the noise, not knowing up from down, and that can lead me to momentarily forget the calm and proper order of reasoning. 

 

There can also come a point where my mind is slow and creaky from being neglected for too long, and it will take me some time to kick it back into shape. 

 

That is very different, however, from deliberately choosing to be obtuse, for the express sake of avoiding the reality of what I do not prefer. 

 

Almost without exception, whenever I have been burdened with extreme doubt, it has had less to do with my inability to understand, and more to do with my unwillingness to understand. 

 

I perversely work backwards, starting with my immediate selfish wants, and then making up excuses to justify my conclusions. As Fulton Sheen so nicely put it, I make myself the measure, instead of a thing measured. 

 

I can’t speak for everyone else in the world, but I do know that I will become a skeptic and a relativist when it is most convenient, not when there is some insurmountable mental obstacle. My problem is moral, not intellectual. 

 

Once I suspected that a weak will was the problem, instead of a weak mind, I was surprised to find how much more easily I could also appeal to others. 

 

“Now are you saying that because you don’t get it, or actually because you won’t get it?”

 

People can become remarkably open when you are brutally honest, sincere but firm. That is often a sign of genuine caring. 

 

Yes, befuddled thoughts can be a problem, though they aren’t our biggest problem. Self-absorbed wishes are a far bigger problem, and they can only be fixed from the inside out. 

 

To say that someone is “strong” is actually a rather neutral and indifferent thing. Strong in what? Strong for what? Strength in ignorance and obstinance is not so good; strength in openness and compassion is quite a bit better. 

Written in 12/2016