Musonius Rufus, Lectures 8.12

When Musonius said these things, the king was glad at his words and told him that he was grateful for what he said and added, "In return for this, ask of me whatever you wish for I shall refuse you nothing."

Then Musonius said, "The only favor I ask of you is to remain faithful to this teaching, since you find it commendable, for in this way and no other will you best please me and benefit yourself."

See, here’s the thing: they think it’s about a balance sheet of one product traded for another product. The players always expect that they have to give something whenever they have received something. They will then ask you for further favors later, of course, and then the game is in full play.

If a rich and powerful man told you he would provide you with anything you wanted in return for your advice, what would you say?

“Yeah, man, give me a million dollars! No wait, ten million dollars! Dude, make it a hundred million dollars! You said whatever I wanted, right?”

Yes, whatever you want. Are you sure that is what you want?

“With that kind of money, I could buy anything!”

No. You couldn’t buy your virtue.

“Who gives a fuck about that?”

Exactly.

Musonius isn’t just being polite here; I think that crazy fellow actually means it. What does your usual bigwig have to give? Money. What does a real philosopher have to give? Wisdom.

Here, once again, is Stoicism at its best. The king assumes he owes something, but the philosopher asks only for the king to be a good king. Where’s the trick?

There is no trick. The model of the wicked man is that he gives so that he might receive; the model of the decent man is that his act of giving is its own receiving.

Some will tell you that there is only self-interest in this world, and that everything is about deals made for profit.

Indeed, every fellow wants what is best for him. Yes, every fellow wants to come out ahead.

Now define the terms of what it means to be the best, and what it means to be coming out ahead.

I’m sorry, was that too much to ask, while you were busy making money and buying your fame? Did you somehow forget the essentials? Did you put the cart before the horse?

Does it offend you when I question your values of making yourself more important, instead of making yourself better?

Good. That can be of use. It can serve as a wake-up call.

Any person, of any background, becomes better by living well, filled with love, in even the smallest ways. Those who choose to love will understand that love expects nothing in return beyond itself, that a loving person gives to make himself better through helping others to be better.

There is no either/or in what is right for you and me; there is only a both/and.

King, whoever you may be, the best thing you can give me is to recognize that we are all made for one another. Give love, and then ask for nothing more. 

Written in 9/1999