Musonius Rufus, Lectures 7.3

Now, since, in general, toil and hardship are a necessity for all men, both for those who seek the better ends and for those who seek the worse, it is preposterous that those who are pursuing the better are not much more eager in their efforts than those for whom there is small hope of reward for all their pains.

Yet when we see acrobats face without concern their difficult tasks and risk their very lives in performing them, turning somersaults over up-turned swords or walking ropes set at a great height or flying through the air like birds, where one misstep means death, all of which they do for a miserably small recompense, shall we not be ready to endure hardship for the sake of complete happiness? For surely there is no other end in becoming good than to become happy and to live happily for the remainder of our lives. 

It may indeed seem odd that I will work harder, and be willing to suffer more, for the wrong things instead of the right things, or for what is less important over what is more important. All those years struggling for the perfect career, the finest home, or the best reputation, and barely a moment spent on becoming kinder, more sincere, or strong enough to love those who may treat me with contempt.

But perhaps it shouldn’t surprise me at all, because the degree of my efforts, and of what I can bear, will be in direct proportion to how much something means to me. How much it means to me will, in turn, follow from my own judgment. As a creature made with reason and choice, it is necessary that I am free to choose error instead of truth, ignorance instead of knowledge.

One thing may seem better than another only because I have decided that it is more immediate or gratifying, when all I have really done is to trade the ultimate for the proximate, or the end for the means. Yes, I will cross over mighty rivers, and climb up the highest mountains, even for the worst possible goals, having foolishly considered them to be the best.

The fact that ignorance is fairly easy and that knowledge already requires its own effort, combined with the force of bad habits and the pressures of conformity, will make it all the easier for me to get myself all mixed up inside.

And so, as with all things Stoic, I must attend to the quality of my own understanding first, and recognize that the circumstances will only be of any worth through the quality of my understanding. I will begin to live well, and be willing to sacrifice anything for it, when I begin to think well.

I should notice how so many of my twisted judgments are joined to the assumption that adding this pleasure, or that possession, or increasing my standing with such and such people, will make me happy. There is already an example of lazy thinking, because it replaces what I do with what is done to me.

The best circus acrobat may receive very little for pursuing his art, yet look at the hard practice that must go into his training, and the dangers he is willing to face. If he will do so much for his profession, I can surely put up with a bit more for my happiness.

Written in 8/1999