Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 8.57

Generally, wickedness does no harm at all to the Universe, and particularly the wickedness of one man does no harm to another.

It is only harmful to him who has it in his power to be released from it as soon as he shall choose.

—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 8 (tr Long)

How often have I thought that life is unfair, that the world is just too dark and dreary, or that I have received less than I deserve?

The Stoic Turn is, however, quite a radical thing. It tells us that what happens will happen, and what is fair is only up to us. It bathes us in light, and reminds us that any darkness is of our own making. It insists that the merit of our lives has nothing to do with what we receive, but is all about what we do.

Of course there is evil. I see people doing it all of the time. But there is the key. What another may do does not determine what I should do.

So you have tried to hurt me. Must I try to hurt you?

So you have given me pain. Must I try to inflict pain?

So I have gotten less. Must I try to make you have less, so that I can have more?

The Stoic Turn only makes sense from a certain view of life. Things will happen as they will, and that is usually outside my power. That these things will happen isn’t evil in any way at all. What you and I choose to do with these circumstances is what will make them good or evil. Morality is not in the things or events, but in our response to the things or events.

Another has lived poorly? That is entirely on him. Have I lived poorly? That is entirely on me. The abuse and the rejection do not need to harm me. No, they actually harm only those who try to take advantage of me or dismiss me.

They say life isn’t fair. Distinguo. I distinguish, and I seek to clarify. Yes, people will not always act well. Let them be, and allow Nature to takes its own course. Now I will decide to act with justice, and that is quite fair. Life will only be as fair as I make it for myself, as I use it to determine my own character.

I can choose to see wickedness as the effort of ignorant minds, as the consequence of misguided choices. In the bigger picture, Providence will turn it to where it needs to be turned. For myself, I will turn it to where it helps me to be a better man.

Understand that bitter people will be bitter, and that nasty people will be nasty, and that the cynically self-righteous will be cynically self-righteous. There is always the victim of the hour, depending upon the trend of the hour. I don’t need to be a victim, or a whiner, or a complainer. There may be gratification in bitching, but there is only peace in acceptance and responsibility.

Written in 5/2008