Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 7.54

Everywhere and at all times it is in your power piously to acquiesce in you present condition, and to behave justly to those who are about you, and to exert your skill upon your present thoughts, that nothing shall steal into them without being well examined.

—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 7 (tr Long)

“It just happened.” “I couldn’t help myself.” “Sorry, but it’s how I felt.” “I didn’t want it to be this way.” “What else could I do?” “He made me do it!” “It isn’t fair!”

These are all expressions that follow from a weakness in ruling our own judgments and actions. I have heard them all many times, and I would be a liar if I didn’t admit that I have used them myself many times, whenever I thought I couldn’t bear the responsibility for who I am or what I have done.

A circumstance may not go as I wished, and I will be faced with a strong impression, perhaps of pain, perhaps of disappointment, perhaps of resentment. If I allow myself to be led by that impression, I have by means of it, in turn, surrendered myself to the circumstance. And so I blame the world, and I excuse myself.

If others have acted poorly, for example, and I act poorly myself in return, I have justified myself through them. But why must what others make of themselves make something of me? Why do I allow the situation to be my master, instead of mastering myself in the face of the situation? The world does not hinder or restrict my own excellence of action; I am only doing that to myself.

I can always accept things as they are, to learn from them, and thereby use them as a means to improve myself. This is never a matter of hopeless surrender, but of a profound respect for the order of all of Nature, of which I am one part among many.

I can always practice justice in the face of injustice, most especially in the face of injustice, because it allows me to make myself better even as another makes himself worse. I would happy if he were to follow my lead, but only he can decide that.

I can always focus upon my own understanding first and foremost, finding confidence in the fact that no circumstance can keep me from doing so. Attending to the present, without worry for the past or the future, is what will make serenity possible.

Perhaps the stock market may crash, or my wife may run off with my best friend, or I may find myself with some lingering disease. The weight of such situations can seem overwhelming, but such a seeming is an illusion; it begins and ends with the assumption that I am unable to be in control of my judgments, choices, and actions. Remove the assumption, and I remove the weight.

I do not need anything more to be happy than contentment with my own character, and so I can honestly decide that I want nothing more. No conditions, substitutes, or evasions are required.

The buck stops here. 

Written in 12/2007