Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 2.6

Do wrong to yourself, do wrong to yourself, my soul; but you will no longer have the opportunity of honoring yourself.

 Every man's life is sufficient.

But yours is nearly finished, though your soul reverences not itself but places your felicity in the souls of others.

—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 2 (tr Long)

Freedom is both liberating and frightening. Stoic self-reliance builds upon the reality that we are not defined by the events that occur around us, and that our own actions are not merely driven by passion and instinct. We are creatures that can think for ourselves, and it is through the power of reason that we can come to understand, and therefore to decide, about what is good. We are not limited to impulsive reaction, but are opened up to choice.

I think about how the same phrase, “I am responsible for myself”, is such a gift when I choose wisely, and such a burden when I choose foolishly. Yet the beauty of choice is such that it remains within my power, for as long as I am living and aware, to decide in a new way, to make right what I have done wrong, to change the quality of my thinking and therefore the quality of my living.

It matters very little what field of circumstances is spread before me, whether Fortune has blessed me with bounty or bound me in need. Each and every choice, under whatever situation I find myself in, gives me the very same opportunity to act with virtue.

Show me hate, and I can choose to love, do me violence and I can choose to offer peace, surround me with lies and I can choose to speak the truth. It is this one thing that always remains completely my own as long as I do not surrender it. I often think of the words of Viktor Frankl:

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

I am aware, however, not only how many times I have abused my freedom by choosing vice, but also how many times I have avoided my commitment to freedom entirely. It seems odd to say that I have chosen not to decide, but I do just that when I know precisely what I must do to live well, but I continue to allow myself to be swept along by what others may do to me. Perhaps it seems easier to do nothing at all, or perhaps I assume that I can defer my decision for a later time. I deceive myself into believing I can make a mess of it right now, and clean it all up down the line.

Yet there will come a time when it is to late to choose what is right, and there will be no more chances to begin living well. I do not have all the time in the world, but I am only assured of this very moment right here and now. It is never too early to choose well, because I already have everything I need within me to do so. 

Written in 7/2004